Like A Feather
by Laylah
Summary: Loz&Yazoo moviebased vignette,contains nonhentai Yaoi, Loz POV.Loz is forced to face his demons and make an important decision.Oneshot.R&R if you like.


**A/N****: Hey people. Another AC movie-based vignette; bored as you can tell. Surprisingly not too angsty and a little longer than I hoped, there's yaoi content but no lemon. Please enjoy. **

**Disclaimer****: I don't own anything. Enough said.**

**LIKE A FEATHER **

The sudden gust of wind whips his long silvered hair about his sombre, tilted face; drawn in cold, passive lines; seemingly devoid of emotion. How he loves to give the impression of a stone statue so effortlessly with that vacant expression that could almost be mistaken for perfect serenity. Almost.

I know it to be false most of the time, deceiving, yet effective. But I don't claim to understand just what lies beneath that icy, blasé exterior. I am not sure I'd like to know.

Now, that stony blue-green gaze is drawn to the summit of the towering ruins that once belonged to Shin-Ra. I've seldom seen him like this; maybe a couple of times before. That same cold light played in his eyes when he confronted Kadaj that day…

…..

Yazoo was incensed. I knew it the moment Kadaj summoned us back.

I stood a few yards away, leaning against my motorbike; pretending to be absorbed in making unnecessary adjustments to my weapon and appear completely uninterested in their dispute, which I could not help but overhear.

"Why did you interfere? Why did you let him go?" Yazoo regarded Kadaj; our youngest, with a disapproving look. He was referring to "our big brother", whom Kadaj had casually allowed to escape when we were so close to finishing him off.

"I changed my mind." Kadaj shrugged. There was a rather vague, taunting glint to his eye that I particularly disliked.

"And why is that, little brother?" Yazoo tilted his head to one side slowly. His voice was silk when he spoke, yet razor-edged. Now it had dropped a soft, dangerous tone that I knew so well. Like me, Yazoo didn't enjoy being beaten around the bush by our capricious brother.

The bored expression on Kadaj's face instantly dropped when Yazoo called him that. For some reason, Kadaj was not fond of being reminded he was our youngest.

"There is no point in killing him yet. We have more important matters to attend to. Or, have you forgotten all about our plans of reunion?" Kadaj said through clenched teeth. I recognized that sharp tinge of cold disdain that crept into his voice when his authority was challenged. Nevertheless, he was the only one of us who was closest to "him", therefore Mother. We had no choice but to acknowledge his superiority in that regard and follow and obey him.

He and Yazoo confronted each other in grim silence for a moment or so, their eyes clashing as their wills collided. Ice on Ice. There was a faint sense of danger in the air. It flowed between them quietly, intensely, as strongly as the bond we three shared. Maybe even stronger, I feared.

Yazoo was not the type to let his emotions get the better of him. Somehow, he too, was aware that Kadaj had the upper hand.

"Which reminds me…we should split up. I'll make a little trip to Healin Lodge and see if I can talk some sense into the president." Kadaj spoke finally, encouraged by Yazoo's lingering stern silence, which he took for submission. A cruel smile twisted his lips as he idly fingered the blood-spattered ID cards belonging to the two Turks we had captured earlier on.

"Fine." Just like that. That nonchalant gaze spoke volumes.

Kadaj appeared satisfied with this display of compliance. Then he flicked a quick, bored glance at me.

"What's up with him?" He nodded in my direction.

Yazoo, who was also looking at me, shrugged in response.

"Well, go and find out. We're wasting time." Kadaj persisted.

"Why don't you?" Yazoo asked casually, and I thought I detected the faintest hint of amusement mixed with resentment. Exactly whom it was directed to remained a question.

Then, without waiting for Kadaj's reaction, Yazoo called to me.

"A penny for your thoughts, Loz?"

"Loz…Ever the deep thinker…" Kadaj sneered, rolling his eyes.

I stiffened. Kadaj; uncaring and callous, plotting and manipulating; fickle little tyrant…Brother mine… He was downright cruel sometimes, deliberately so. He had no regard for others and Yazoo and I both suspected he secretly derived a twisted pleasure from others' suffering, and relished being the cause of their misery. But I also sensed he could not help it, as this was Kadaj's nature, and I had accepted that, learned to deal with it and play dumb. He knew I would never become violent with him. Emboldened by this knowledge, Yazoo and Kadaj always seized the slightest opportunity to see how far they could push it. Despite all their similarities, the glaring difference between them was that Yazoo knew when to quit.

And so, I paid no attention to Kadaj, who was already starting up his motorbike.

His back turned to our youngest; Yazoo stared at me with a small, meaningful smile. He and I both knew the reason why I refused to put our little tyrant in his place, and beat his smug, handsome face to a bloody pulp until he was crying for mercy.

"You seem a bit disgruntled, Loz." Yazoo observed.

"I want to find mother." I said thoughtfully.

"Makes two of us." Kadaj nodded in agreement, then sneered at Yazoo. "Or three?"

Yazoo gave no reaction. It was like dealing with a slab of concrete.

"Anyway, I'm off. You know where to meet me later. Try not to take too long." Kadaj ordered brusquely and sped off.

I looked at Yazoo with a mix of awe and astonishment as he rolled his icy mako eyes at the rapidly disappearing form of our brother.

He yawned and stretched his long limbs. I tried not to stare at the subtle ripple of his sleek muscles beneath the clinging black leather, but how I failed miserably, much to my shame.

I cursed the wind that toyed so playfully with that sideswept, icy white long fringe, I cursed the clouded sunshine that ever so slightly shifted the blue shades in his softly glittering mako eyes, and I cursed that sensual, upward curve of those pouting lips.

All these little details I forced myself to overlook before were thrown in vivid shades before me, filling me with a strange longing. And I wondered why I should feel this way about my "brother". But then, Yazoo and I were always close, I reminded myself to justify my unrighteous fascination. Somehow, I wanted him closer…

…..

"Ready when you are."

His low-pitched, velvety resonant voice jolts me from my reverie, and I realize he too, is watching me rather distractedly, amusedly.

I quickly avert my ashamed gaze to the derelict remnants of Shin-Ra headquarters. Kadaj is there, somewhere, with "him."

But the most disturbing revelation is the uncharacteristic reluctance Yazoo does not bother to conceal in the slightest. We are both compelled to join Kadaj, and somehow, Yazoo is fighting against it. He wants to break the bond that will eventually make us whole. Brother…Betrayer…

I lapse into silence, not daring to defy the greater will that controls my destiny and all that I am, yet unwilling to deny the growing resentment for it, and the desire to be free.

In a way, I envy and pity Kadaj at the same time, for amongst us, he is the only one who senses "his" presence the most, he who is favoured by Mother. And as such, he carries a heavier burden than the rest of us put together. We were all possessed of a single-minded devotion to Mother, but Kadaj is simply obsessed, and it did worry me at times, that because of this boundless…love, something else takes over him entirely; someone else. Now I know.

I tilt my head back and quickly scan the building's summit, trying to catch a glimpse of Kadaj. But all I see is the blonde, sword-bearing silhouette…and another…

Majestic, darkly resplendent being with flowing silver hair and a massive, glowing sword I had never seen before. His presence instils overwhelming sense of veneration and dread, and I look on mutely, trying to determine the next course of our twisted path.

He came back; just as Kadaj said.

I realize this is it. This is the ultimate turning point where everything is decided.

Yazoo patiently lingers by my side, but then, he always did, where Kadaj could not be bothered. Unlike Kadaj, Yazoo never accused me of being over-emotional, possessive and needy. And it was always his words that dragged me out of my misery, the warmth of his hand upon mine that drove out my insecurity when Kadaj –perhaps unknowingly- put me down. The knowledge comforts me like none other.

I dart a hesitant glance up to the venerated being locked in combat with our "big brother".

Still I remain silent and rigid, torn between joining the battle and not interfering.

Yazoo has the oddest gleam in his eyes; without words I hear him; urging me to let go. His thoughts whisper to me to let go of Kadaj and what he has become, I hear it just as clearly as the other one that beckons me, and compels me to him…

We've come this far, so close to achieving our goal, yet a part of me resists; struggling alongside Yazoo to break free of the chains that bind us together in order to claim the most precious prize; freedom.

I cannot defy Mother's will. It is an instinct that can never be cured. I do not have the strength, not like Yazoo. Despite all this, he's not willing to leave me. He will not let me go there alone. He reads me like an open book.

What truly fills me with guilt is the fact that he is willing to embrace the fate I have chosen for both of us. He's ready to follow me into whatever bleak fate that might lie ahead. He is ready to fight and fall with me. And die with me…

The knowledge makes me giddy, intoxicated, and powerful. For the first time, I am amazed at my own ability to suppress my tears.

"We have to go to Kadaj…" I breathe, barely able to recognize my own voice.

"Are you sure that's not going to be too much hassle?" Yazoo softly teases, with laughter in his otherwise glassy cold eyes.

Without thought, I draw him to me and sink my fingers into his gossamer-soft silver hair. Just when I expect him to push me away in startled disgust, Yazoo places a hand on the nape of my neck, slowly massaging over the tensed muscles there. The fierce light in his eyes intensifies as I caress my lips over his parted mouth with deliberate, tender slowness. His eyelids quiver, and he inhales sharply, clearly savouring the moment that torments us both. As seconds pass, it is fast becoming memory of a moment that will melt away and dissolve into nothingness once we become one in lifestream to choke the planet and bring its doom.

I incline my head downward gloomily, in sadness. I pull away, reluctantly, determined not to lose myself in the bliss of our companionship…Though still I surrender to the bliss that came too late, and tears of my regret…

Like a feather, I feel the brush of his lips on my brow.

"It's time to play." Yazoo whispers. His voice holds a tinge of mirth and sorrow both.

I nod once, and together we make our way up to the top of the building where Sephiroth is dying, and Kadaj with him. I do not look back; with Yazoo at my side, I know I shall not cry any more, not now, not ever...

**-FIN-**


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